Xuefeng answered, "When I arrived for the first time at the place of Yanguan, I heard him explaining the meaning of form and emptiness. At that moment, I attained some understanding." The footnote says, "Bah! Cover your mouth; don't let anyone hear you. To even speak of it is a sin."
Yantou says, "Even 30 years from now, you should avoid talking about it." The footnote says, "It's embarrassing. Even the buddhas are red-faced."
Xuefeng replied, "I also read Dongshan's enlightenment poem. The one he wrote after crossing the river. It reads: 'Earnestly avoid seeking without. It will just move further away from you. Today, I am walking alone, yet everywhere I meet it. It's no other than myself, but I am not now it. It must be seen in this way in order to realize suchness.'" Footnote says, "Ah, what is he saying?"
Now, the fact is that poem of Dongshan's is precisely the truth. But so long as Xuefeng goes on talking about the poem of Dongshan, it remains the poem of Dongshan -- it remains the description of someone else's experience and is not personal. He says, "I attained some realization from this verse, too." Yantou says, "If it's like that, you won't even be able to save yourself." The